Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Deep Evil (2004)

11/10 This movie proves 110% is possible

Lorenzo Lamas!  Need I say more?  Oh yeah! Fine then! I'll be goddamned if this isn't one of the best movies EVER!!!  From the opening scene with Lorenzo getting some action from some young little bucket to the surprise twist at the end of the movie, this movie never quits.  I will ask you this:  What should a movie be based on when everything has been done already?  How about a super intelligent alien made of goo that has a sole purpose of survival by eradicating the human race?  The goo uses the human body as a host and devours the body until it is nothing but goo itself.  The goo then uses the appearance of the body, which is now just liquid, as camouflage in order to get close enough to fuck people up.  Just a thought:  I'm thinking that the writer of this movie may have had a little super intelligent goo in himself when he wrote this gem.  Anywho, this goo crap wants to kill the assault team (Lorenzo Lamas), sent into a biological research facility to address a code-red, shutdown, oh! shit! alarm that has been set off, but Lorenzo will have none of that.  I don't think this guy can go five minutes without beating the piss out of something.  If you didn't respect Lorenzo after Snake Eater 3, then you will definitely respect him after he sacrifices himself, to save his team and humanity.



I know what you're thinking, "What kind of lame explanation do they give for the alien getting to earth?"  How about this:  This badass alien was in a meteorite that crashed during the cold war.  The Russians discovered it and tried to multiply the specimen to create a biological weapon.  When the experiment got out of control, the Ruskies had to nuke the area (Chernobyl), to kill the alien.  When the Americans rediscover the alien, they try to create a biological weapon, and study it in case the aliens decide to invade earth.  Wouldn't you know it, the alien gets out of control again.  This movie goes to prove that our secret weapon against an alien invasion is in fact Lorenzo Lamas.



4 comments:

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  2. This is a terrible movie. Nearly every depiction of the US Army is wrong in it - from the way they talk, wear their berets, rank, branch insignia, etc.

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  3. I should be going Sportacus said to Bessie andturned to leave. He keeps wanting tostand up to pee, and when he forgets it just rubs it in.
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    I should be going Sportacus said to Bessie andturned to leave. He keeps wanting tostand up to pee, and when he forgets it just rubs it in.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wrong! All of Lorenzo's movies SUCK, but he is an Alpha male. As for the shorts, Lamas has "shorts" and Van Damm has a speedo, way coooool!!!! The old style LONG Dork shorts are ......OUT!!!!

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